DurumGuru's avatar

DurumGuru

38 Watchers84 Deviations
5.6K
Pageviews

Dear anedien...

7 min read
Stole this from: :iconfortressgamer1:

To: :iconanedien:

Dear Anedien,                        
I don't really know how to tell you this, but I'm in love with your cat. I think I realized it last year when you peed your pants in your closet and I saw you sit on my father. I'm sure you're high enough to understand that your driving sucks. I'm returning our matching snoopy underwear to you, but I'll keep the results of that blood sample as a memory. You should also know that I get sick when I think of your feet and you should stop picking your nose.
Go milk a cow,
DurumGuru~

How to do this:

Dear (Choose a random person.),                            
I don't really know how to tell you this, but (1). I think I realized it when (2) (3) and I saw you (4) (5). I'm sure you're (6) enough to understand (7). I'm returning (8) to you, but I'll keep (9) as a memory. You should also know that I (10) and (11).
(12),
(Your name)

1) What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - I'm in love with your cat
Red - Our affair is over
White - The rainbow hedgehogs want to destroy you
Black -Our romance is over
Green- Our socks don't match
Grey - You're a leprechaun
Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - I'm joining the Convent
Other -I dislike your eyelashes

2) Which is your birth month?
January - That night you picked your nose
February -When I quoted Forrest Gump
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on Nutella
May - When I threw up in your sock drawer
June - When you put cuffs on me
July – When I saw the purple monkey
August - When you smacked my ass
September - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub
October -Last year when you peed your pants
November - When your dog humped my leg
December - When I finally changed my underwear

3) Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Chicken- In your car
Pasta - Outside of your office
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad – In your apartment
Lasagna - In your closet
Kebab - With Jean Chrétien
Seafood - In a clown suit
Sandwiches - At the Elton John concert
Pizza - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a street light
Annat- With George Bush and Stephen Harper

4) What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Ignore
Red - Put whipped cream on
Black - Hit on
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - bit of
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the pants off of
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive over

5) What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My boyfriend
White - My father
Grey – The Catholic Priest
Brown – The Montreal Canadiens' goalie
Purple - My corned beef hash
Red – My knee caps
Blue - My salt-beef bucket
Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange - My Blink 182 CD
Pink – Your "My Little Pony" collection
Other - The elephant in the corner

6) What do you prefer to watch on TV?
One Tree Hill - Senile
Heroes- Frostbitten
Lost - High
Simpsons- Cowardly
The news - Scarred
American Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Open
Top Model - Middle-class
Annat -shamed
House- Sterile

7) Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful you are
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That I get turned on only by my the garbage man
Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed – That we're related
Excited - That I may pee my pants
Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried - That your Ford sucks
Apathetic - That you need a sex-change
Silly - That I'm allergic to your earlobes
Cuddly - That Santa doesn't exist
Ashamed - That there is no solution to you being a dumb kid
Other - That your driving sucks

8) What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Our matching snoopy underwear
Yellow - Your love letters to me
Red - The pictures from Vegas
Black - Your pet rock
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - Your car
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your nose hair clippers
Grey - Your toe ring
Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
Pink - The cut toenails

9) The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your collection of butterflies
C/D - Your photo with the moustache drawn on it
E/F - Your neighbors dog
G/H - The oil tank from your car
I/J - Your left ear
K/L - The results of that blood-sample
M/N - Your glass eye
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your virginity
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X – Your sucide note
Y/Z - Your credit cards

10) The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Get sick when I think of your feet
C/D - Always will remember the pep talks
E/F -Never will forget that night
G/H – Will not tell the authorities that you stole the whale from the backyard.
I/J – Mocked you behind your back constantly
K/L - Hate your cooking
M/N -  Love your sweet, sweet ass
O/P - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
Q/R - Always wanted to break your legs
S/T -Told in my confession today about the moose poaching
U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart
W/X -  Haven't showered in a month
Y/Z – am better off without you

11) What do you prefer to drink?
Wine- Our friendship is ruined
Soft drink – I love Oprah
Milk - The apartment building is on fire
Water – I'm scratching my butt as you read this
Cider– I have a passionate interest for mice
Juice – You ruined my attempts at another world war.
Snapple/Vitamin water – You should get that embarrassing rash checked out
Hot chocolate – Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird
Whiskey - I'm off to lead a new life as a lemon
Beer – Thanks for the Cocaine
Other – you should stop picking your nose

12) To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand – Warm tingly sensations
France - Love always
Spain - With tears of sadness
China – You make me sick
Germany – Please don't hurt me
Japan - Go milk a cow
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
USA - Best of luck on the sex change
Egypt – Kiss my butt
England - Go drown yourself
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
Okay so if you people comment I will answer this stuff things yeah... comment~ comment~ comment~

1. Tell you something I learned about you by looking at your DA for 20 seconds. 
2. Tell you a color you remind me of. 
3. Tell you an element I think you belong to (eg: water, fire, earth, air, etc.)
4. Tell you what character you remind me of. 
5. Ask you a question, and you must answer. 
6. Tell you something that I like about you. 
7. Tell you the object that is to the left of me. 
8. Tell you what food/flavor/smell you remind me of. 
9. Guess your gender. 
10. Tell you to put this on your journal.
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In

I'm bored...

1 min read
Who actually READS my journals? (i know who you are anyway )
Let's see who reads this entirely...leave me a one word comment that best describes me, using the second letter of your first name. 
It can only be one word.
Then copy and paste this to your journal so I can leave a word about you. 
Don't just PUT a word and NOT copy, that's no fun <--- actually i don't care.. :iconyea-plz:

Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In

Let Yourself Go

5 min read
Rules
1. Put your mp3 on Shuffle
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer
3. You must write that song name down no matter how silly it sounds!
4. Tag at least 3 people!


IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
"Set the World on Fire" by Black Veil Brides
Of course!. Cause I'm that awesome

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
"Sweet 16" by Green Day
whut?. I'm not 16 yeeet..

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
"Warning" by Green Day
I guess I like people who can't take care of themselves?.

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
"Heaven's Calling" by Black Veil Brides
To.. I don't even know..

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
"Nobody's hero" by Black Veil Brides
I'm just so messed up, that I can't be a hero..?.

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
"Days Are Numbered" by Black Veil Brides
That I will someday die, and it will happen real soon.

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
"Heart Attack" by Demi Lovato
That I will get a heart attack and die.. Just like that, I'm dead.

WHAT IS 2+2?
"Are we the Waiting" by Green Day
That makes sense!. No.. No I doesn't..

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
"Worry Rock" by Green Day 
That she becoming a rebel/punk person and I'm very very very very worried. 

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
"The Legacy" by Black Veil Brides
The person I like is a legacy!. YOSH, my life just got that much better!!.

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
"The Forgotten" by Green Day
I'm a forgotten person.. How sad

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
"Lazy Bones" by Green Day
I want to be so lazy that I can't do anything.

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
"Drama queen" by Green Day
SO the person I like is a legacy AND a drama queen?. WHAT??.

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
"American Idiot" by Green Day
LOOL!!. I'm not American though..

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
"Hunter & Prey" by Emmelie De Forest
Sure.. Sure..

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
"Youth and Whiskey" by Black Veil Brides
YEESH!!. I would actually be kind of happy?. I really like this song xD

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
"Wonder" by Naughty Boy
I like wondering.. A lot, so much that it's only thing I do all day..

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
"Payphone" by Maroon 5
Psst.. Wanna hear my secret?. Payphone!. *giggle giggle*

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
"Savior" by Black Veil Brides
That a person, who happened to be my saviour saved me!!. Nobody should ever save me!!. BLLAAARGH!!.
Actually that would be pretty good if that happened to me.. Oh well.

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
"Restless Heart Syndrome" by Green Day
I will get a decease that i doesn't have a cure yet and die, just die.

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
"Hitchin' A Ride" by Green Day
I have actually never done that.. *shiver* but I could imagine what the bad thing could have been if I did..

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
"Wretched and Divine" by Black Veil Brides
pffst!!. Noo... Wretched and Divine *giggle* noo.. 

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
"Prosthetic Head" by Green Day
yeah.. yeah.. why not..

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
"Change" by Emmelie De Forest
No, I will change.. change into clothes!!. No, but actually the songs is about a person who will never ever ever ever change.. So it will still be no..

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
"In the End" by Black Veil Brides
Death?.

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
"We are Never Ever getting back together" by Taylor Swift
No, because my last bf and had an on and off relationship and now we aren;t getting back together. (actually I have never had a bf..)

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE
"Fallen Angels" by Black Veil Brides
I would change that there never was angels who actually fell and became vampires... 

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
"Never Give in" by Black Veil Brides
Yeah.. fine to never give in hurts me very very bad. and bullies. 

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
"Let Yourself Go" by Green Day
YOSH!. I will accept the challenge!!.

Tags:
:iconsamonmis: :iconcaptain-wormy: :iconjosefine1243: :iconanedien:
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
Featured

Dear anedien... by DurumGuru, journal

Comment~ (or you'll die) by DurumGuru, journal

I'm bored... by DurumGuru, journal

Let Yourself Go by DurumGuru, journal